a girl on a bench

when you first both discover
the love you have for each other
that whole hearted love
it’s a miraculous thing
they’re all you think about
they’re all you want to do good for
all you want to be amazing for
and the affection is overflowing
out of flower pots
in your bedroom
and the flowers don’t seem to die

then months go by
and you’re feeling that light hearted love
where the falling apart
is completely finished
and the love is real
but it’s just sitting there
like my grandma does
in her chair all day

and after all this time
i find myself with heavy hearted love
not wholehearted
not light hearted
but a heavy
sinking to the bottom heart
where the love is so strong
as strong as it ever was
but yet now
as strong as it ever could be

and he’s light hearted
and you’re begging
for his whole heart
to come and cuddle with yours
that’s gradually sinking
and you’re overthinking
every possible move he makes
because you want every one of them
to be just for you

how they used to
because you know that your heavy heart
is breathing for his

-gabina